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Tired of your newborn looking pale and stupid.  Well get excited, because Asheville’s premier sweat shop/meat market is now offering baby tanning.  That’s right, the Rush, has converted 5 Easy Bake ovens into pint-sized tanning beds so that your little one will know longer feel self-conscious about its pale pasty skin.  The owners are also hoping to open a studio space in order to offer electrolysis for your dog or cat.  The pet hair will then be donated to Asheville’s first annual Furries Convention coming later this year.

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